I feel so uncertain. I don't even know if I can continue to do this anymore. It seems like nothing will help anyways. I'm feeling more and more hopeless.
The dietitian I am seeing at the Emily Program made a meal plan for me but it's hard to stick to it, I fear gaining weight. I feel fine at my weight, maybe just lose a little more.. I don't really see it as a problem anyways. Everyday it seems like the depression doesn't get any better, even with the meds. I just feel miserable most of the time, it's a horrible feeling. I can't take it anymore, I just wish it would all end. I don't know what my family thinks about all this, or what they know. We don't really discuss it much, all I know is that my parents know but not sure what or if my siblings know. I feel like people would just treat me different or look at me differently if they knew everything that has been going on.
There are days where I wish I wasn't me, if I wasn't here, would anyone even care?
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